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02-10-2013, 09:38 PM,
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Rob Wick
Hero Member
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Posts: 3,038
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RE: Mary's Reputation
Gene,
All except for Dick Nixon. 
Best
Rob
Abraham Lincoln is the only man, dead or alive, with whom I could have spent five years without one hour of boredom.--Ida M. Tarbell
I want the respect of intelligent men, but I will choose for myself the intelligent.
--Carl Sandburg
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02-24-2013, 07:00 PM,
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Tom Emery
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Posts: 62
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Joined: Sep 2012
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RE: Mary's Reputation
Something I realized recently about Mary is that while her husband was the 16th President, she was several short from being the 16th First Lady, or President's wife. Some of her predecessors were also much less visible than other Presidential wives.
Jefferson, Jackson, and Van Buren were all widowers when they assumed the Presidency, while Buchanan was never married (his niece, Harriett Lane, acted as White House hostess).
Tyler's first wife, Letitia, was an invalid who died during his administration and barely came downstairs (he remarried a woman 30 years younger than him later in his term). Pierce's wife, distraught and bitter from the loss of their son, was not particularly active.
Also, Martha Washington never lived in Washington, D.C., because the capital was not located there at the time. William Henry Harrison, he of 31 days service, would not have had a wife who left much impression, if only because she didn't have the time.
Whether or not this has contributed to the negative perceptions of Mary (in that there were fewer Presidential wives to compare her to, or less visible ones) is, obviously, a debate. But it is nonetheless interesting, or at least it is to me.
As an aside, while we have no direct descendants of Lincoln remaining, Tyler apparently has two elderly grandchildren who are still alive. He was still fathering children into his seventies, as, apparently, did one of his sons.
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02-25-2013, 08:04 PM,
(This post was last modified: 02-25-2013, 08:12 PM by Tom Emery.)
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Tom Emery
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Posts: 62
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Joined: Sep 2012
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RE: Mary's Reputation
Roger, I absolutely think her Confederate relative ties had something to do with her negative perception.
Confederate Brig. Gen. Benjamin Hardin Helm, who married Mary's half-sister Emilie, was killed at Chickamauga, and Mary had others in Southern service as well. Emilie, as you all know, spent a great deal of time at the White House afterward, where she remained vocal in her Southern leanings.
I've always said the myth of "Brother Against Brother" in the Civil War was kind of overrated, but it certainly applies to Mary Todd's life.
Roger & Herb, I should also mention that I agree with earlier postings about Herndon's role. Rob and Roger are right -- you can't put it all on Herndon. But I certainly think he played a key role in the poor perception of Mary.
Mary, obviously, didn't help herself, with her temper and her emotional imbalances that helped build some enemies. I think there are several factors, and Herndon is among them, as well as her Confederate relatives.
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02-26-2013, 02:48 PM,
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Deb@Library
Junior Member
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Posts: 6
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RE: Mary's Reputation
Mary's favorite brother Alecks was killed at the Battle of Baton Rouge. She later told her half-sister Emilie that he and Willie came to visit her "in her dreams." The Northerners believed her a spy because of her Confederate roots and the Southerners believed her a traitor because she was married to Lincoln. Plus, Washington Society (including Miss Harriet Lane, the former White House First Lady) ascribed many of Lincoln's rough qualities to Mary despite her fluent French, aristocratic family, education, and impeccable manners. The girl couldn't win!
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02-26-2013, 08:25 PM,
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Tom Emery
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Posts: 62
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RE: Mary's Reputation
Laurie, I agree with your assessments, and I also agree with the earlier post on Mary's good attributes that were ignored by Washington society (and many others, then and since).
I really believe that too much has been made of Mary's faults and failings, and far too little on her good qualities. She was well-read, well-educated, well-spoken, and politically astute, traits which were few and far between in women of the 19th-century, even those of the higher social standing that Mary had.
She was also highly maternal and deeply loved children, particularly her own. To me, those are great qualities to have.
Did she have flaws? Yes, and obvious ones. But, I think too much has been made of those, to her detriment.
Also, I find it interesting that she compares so poorly to other First Ladies, at least in the eyes of some historians. First Ladies, on the whole, are a headstrong, ambitious type. They have often come from the higher echelons of society, and are accustomed to that style of living.
Many have not brought nice attributes to the position. Nellie Taft was highly ambitious and had her eye on the White House since helping out as a teenager to Lucy Hayes in that administration. While her husband was not particularly interested in being President, she wanted it very much, and made that very clear.
Ida McKinley, who suffered from epilepsy and other ailments, was very spoiled; William McKinley would often have to let her win at card games to keep her happy (reflective of his great devotion to her). These are just a couple of examples.
I've wondered if some of Mary's lower moments, such as City Point, would have been handled differently by other First Ladies. I'm not so sure they would have.
In recent years, First Ladies of both parties have given critics reason to chirp, often with justification. I'm not telling anyone how to vote, and I'm not trying to overlook the positives that many Presidential wives have brought to their positions. I'm only saying to look at it from all sides.
I believe that, to compare Mary poorly with other First Ladies is giving the other Presidential wives more credit than may be deserved, and Mary too much blame (again) for her weaknesses.
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Mary's Reputation
