Did Robert Lincoln Ride the Funeral Train to Baltimore?

[Eva Elisabeth]

(05-02-2015 12:13 PM)LincolnToddFan Wrote:  It always saddens me that RTL and his only son are at Arlington Cemetery in virtual anonymity, separated for all eternity from the Lincolns. It is definitely not what RTL envisioned or wanted.

Shame on Mary Harlan.

Toia, I used to think and feel the same. But upon reconsideration, my understanding is that Mary Harlan probably didn't like Mary Lincoln very much. From M. H.'s point of view I can understand the decision - I would like to be buried with my husband and child, but would you like to rest for all eternity next to a person you don't like? Quite many people I suppose wouldn't like to be buried with their mother-in-law.

Robert had left the Lincoln Home at quite young age to make his own way, he was not parental-home-bound. I know in 1922, Robert wrote to a friend about Oak Ridge that "...it is arranged that my wife and myself shall be entombed there", but maybe Mary Harlan hadn't dared to utter her objections to Robert, and Robert just made the decision for "practical" reasons, without much considereation regarding alternatives?

I think Mary and Robert loved each other and took marriage serious, so the most important is they are together. Jack died non-adolescent before he could make his own way, so he still belonged to the core family and it was right to bury him with his parents.
Had Jack had a family of his own, he also might not have been buried with either of the former generations (nor was Abraham Lincoln buried next to his beloved mother).
And Mary Harlan had her own quite prestigious family and didn't insist in being buried with them either, so maybe a neutral place is fair in the end.