Lincoln & Herndon

[Eva Elisabeth]

Just to clarify, I by no means wanted to defend what Herndon did to Mary in and with his lectures and writings, and I agree on all you said, Roger and Toia. My point was just that though there might have been dislike, I don't think there was hate on both sides in and from the beginning.

But the worst thing she ever said about Herndon was that he was a drunk-which was in fact the truth. She never stooped as low as he did with her.

Yes, not towards him, but she, too, was capable of seriously hurting others, she didn't have a "clean record" in such matters either. Again, this shall not justify what Herndon did.

Why does Mary seem to get 100% of the blame and Abraham 0%?

Douglas Wilson in "The Mary Lincoln Enigma" wrote: "In spite of his reputation as her sworn enemy who in later years engaged her in 'open warfare', a consistent theme in Herndon's correspondence from 1866 on is that Mary Lincoln had been unfairly condemned as the sole source of difficulty in the Lincoln marriage and that Lincoln, who was not an attentive and helpful husband, deserved a share of the blame....In 1866, he had twice used a phrase that captures the essence of it: 'what I know and shall tell only ennobles both - that is so to say it will show that Mrs. L. has had cause to suffer, and be almost crazed, while Lincoln self sacrified himself rather than to be charged with dishonor.'" (Source for the latter quote: WHH to Charles H. Hart, Dec.1866, Hart Papers)