Lincoln and Ann Rutledge

[Lewis Gannett]

(06-30-2014 11:14 AM)David Lockmiller Wrote:  

(06-30-2014 09:11 AM)Lewis Gannett Wrote:  One of the striking things about the [Abell's] testimony is that nobody, not even anyone in the Rutledge family, related an eyewitness memory of Lincoln courting Rutledge.

It is my understanding that there was at least one exception to your statement, and that exception was Mrs. Jeane Berry, sister of Ann Rutledge. Ida M. Tarbell wrote in her book The Early Life of Abraham Lincoln at page 218:

Many years ago a sister of Ann Rutledge, Mrs. Jeane Berry, told what she knew of Ann's love affairs; and her statement has been preserved in a diary kept by the Rev. R. D. Miller, now Superintendent of Schools of Menard County, with whom she had the conversation. She declared that Ann's "whole soul seemed wrapped up in Lincoln," and that they "would have been married in the fall or early winter" if Ann had lived. "After Ann died," said Mrs. Berry, "I remember that it was common talk about how sad Lincoln was; and I remember myself how sad he looked. They told me that every time he was in the neighborhood after she died, he would go alone to her grave and sit there in silence for hours.

I understand that you have a book that you are writing in which I believe that you will be making two related arguments 1) that there was really no significant love relationship between Abraham Lincoln and Ann Rutledge and 2) that Abraham Lincoln was gay.

Any evidentiary weakness within the first argument would undoudtedly weaken the second argument. I underlined, italicized, and bolded the most important parts so that you would not miss them.

After Rev. R. D. Miller showed his diary to Ida Tarbell, the diary disappeared. We therefore have no confirmation that Tarbell's quotes from it are accurate. I'm skeptical about this diary. Ann's sister, identified by Tarbell as Jeane or perhaps Jean, was identified by Robert Rutledge to Herndon as Jane Rutledge. Her claim that "they told me" that Lincoln sat in silence for hours by Ann's grave seems odd. Who was "they"? She claimed to have seen Lincoln looking sad; but she didn't herself see Lincoln silently frequenting the grave. I don't recall anyone else in Ann's family talking for the record about Lincoln haunting the grave. This account looks like an invention.

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(06-30-2014 01:03 PM)David Lockmiller Wrote:  

(06-30-2014 11:14 AM)David Lockmiller Wrote:  

(06-30-2014 09:11 AM)Lewis Gannett Wrote:  One of the striking things about the [Abell's] testimony is that nobody, not even anyone in the Rutledge family, related an eyewitness memory of Lincoln courting Rutledge.

It is my understanding that there was at least one exception to your statement, and that exception was Mrs. Jeane Berry, sister of Ann Rutledge. Ida M. Tarbell wrote in her book The Early Life of Abraham Lincoln at page 218:

Many years ago a sister of Ann Rutledge, Mrs. Jeane Berry, told what she knew of Ann's love affairs; and her statement has been preserved in a diary kept by the Rev. R. D. Miller, now Superintendent of Schools of Menard County, with whom she had the conversation. She declared that Ann's "whole soul seemed wrapped up in Lincoln," and that they "would have been married in the fall or early winter" if Ann had lived. "After Ann died," said Mrs. Berry, "I remember that it was common talk about how sad Lincoln was; and I remember myself how sad he looked. They told me that every time he was in the neighborhood after she died, he would go alone to her grave and sit there in silence for hours.

I understand that you have a book that you are writing in which I believe that you will be making two related arguments 1) that there was really no significant love relationship between Abraham Lincoln and Ann Rutledge and 2) that Abraham Lincoln was gay.

Any evidentiary weakness within the first argument would undoudtedly weaken the second argument. I underlined, italicized, and bolded the most important parts so that you would not miss them.

I have done some additional research on this issue and I intend to do more.

Professor Burlingame has added information from three other close relatives of Ann that you appear to have missed in your Lincoln scholarship research on this topic, Ann’s sisters -- Nancy and Sarah and her brother David. (See below Abraham Lincoln: A Life, Vol. One, page 99 - 100.)

“[A]ccording to Ann’s sister Nancy, ‘he [Lincoln] declared his love and was accepted for she loved him with a more mature and enduring affection than she had ever felt for McNamar. No one could have seen them together and not be convinced that they loved each other truly.’” (Source reference: Interview with Nancy Rutledge Prewitt, conducted by Margaret Flindt, Fairfield, Iowa, correspondence, 10 Feb., Chicago Inter-Ocean, 12 Feb. 1899.)

“Ann’s brother David urged her to marry Lincoln even before the return of her whilom fiancé, but she declined so that she could personally explain to McNamar her change of heart.” (Professor Burlingame did not provide a source reference in this instance.)

“According to her sister Sarah, Ann ‘had brain fever and was out of [her] head all the time till about two days before she died, when she came to herself and called for Abe.’ Bowling Green fetched Lincoln. When he arrived ‘everybody left the room and they talked together.’ Emerging from that room, Lincoln ‘stopped at the door and looked back. Both of them were crying.’ (Source reference: Sarah Rutledge Saunders, interview with Katherine Wheeler, Chicago Tribune Magazine, 22 Feb. 1922.)

David: Note that the interviews are dated many decades after Ann Rutledge died. I deal with these sources and these quotes at tedious length in my 2010 JALA article, p. 27. I wonder if I should type out some of it here. That seems ridiculous--it's long--but maybe it's the thing to do. All right, let's see how far I can get. Here goes, from just one footnote, #29, out of 140 footnotes in the article:

As Michael Burlingame puts it, "Few details of that [Lincoln-Rutledge] courtship survive." Abraham Lincoln: A Life, 99. This is an understatement. The number of specific ocasions that Lincoln and Ann Rutledge were recalled to have been seen together are exceedingly few. Her younger sister, Nancy Cameron Rutledge Prewitt, told of helping Ann and Abe fix a bed at the Rutledge Tavern in New Salem that he and one of Ann's brother's had broken during a "romp and scuffle" the night before. See Margaret Flindt, "Lincoln as a Lover. His Courtship of Ann Rutledge of New Salem in 1835," Chicago Inter-Ocean, interview conducted with Nancy Rutledge Prewitt in Fairfield, Iowa, February 10, 1899, page 3 of a typescript transcript of the original article in the Jane Hammond compilation for the Decatur Lincoln Memorial Collection (November 1921), now at the Abraham Lincoln Presidential Library. In this interview (page 5) Nancy Prewitt stated, "No one could have seen them together and not be convinced that they loved each other truly." But the only specific activity Nancy Prewitt reported concerned the repair of the bed. Nancy recalled Lincoln paying respects to the dying Ann: "I can never forget how sad and broken-hearted...."

That's only half of footnote #29. David, I have a suggestion. You've displayed admirable persistence in digging into the Rutledge/Lincoln record. If you really want to find out what I've missed--and I'm the first to acknowledge that I might have missed something--you first must read my article, to find out what I haven't missed. You can Google the article. Easy as pie. Go to Section II, p. 27. Good luck.

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(06-30-2014 11:00 AM)LincolnToddFan Wrote:  Just chiming in...the idea that the Lincolns did not share a bed during their WH years has been disproven by two separate eyewitnesses on two separate occasions:

July 12 1861 "....it was 4am on July12, the sixth time that night that Lincoln was awoken by a knock on the door from Colonel Daniel Butterfield, his military secretary. Wearing nothing but a red flannel shirt, which he struggled to hold down in front him, Lincoln answered the door "Colonel, do you ever sleep"?..........the colonel apologized for yet another disturbance, but he was there under orders from General Scott. Lincoln explained that his dressing gown was twisted around his wife's feet and not wanting to wake her, he came out in his shirt instead. "Either I have grown too long or the shirt has grown too short, I know not which," he said, still struggling to hold the shirt down in front of him. (The President's War/Chris DeRose/ pg#91)

So, he was not only sharing a bed with MTL, he was apparently doing so in the nude on this particular occasion. If his dressing gown was tangled around the feet of his sleeping wife, where was his nightshirt? Why did he have to throw on a shirt(that he struggled to cover his modesty with?)

The other occasion is mentioned in Matthew Pinsker's "Lincoln's Sanctuary" when Captain Charles Derickson came to the Soldier's Home in the middle of the night in July 1863 with a message for the president which he delivered directly to Lincoln's bedroom and spoke to him with Mary lying beside him. Charles Derickson was ironically the son of David Derickson, who is alleged by some to have been AL's lover.

In separate letters to Mary Jane Welles and Elizabeth Dixon in the summer of 1865, several weeks after AL's murder, Mary lamented the loss of the man she said had been everything to her..." he was always my all...LOVER(emphasis mine) husband, father...truly, truly my ALL"(emphasis MTL) Leavitt and Turner/ Letters of Mary Todd Lincoln

If the sexual side of her marriage had been over for years, why did Mary make a point to refer to Lincoln as her lover(to two intimate friends) instead of simply calling him husband and father?

They slept in separate bedrooms in the WH and for the last few years of their time in Springfield, but their rooms were always conjoined. According to the memoirs of Emilie Todd Helm (Mary's sister) and Elizabeth Keckly, Lincoln could and did frequent his wife's bedroom and sitting rooms...and he never knocked before entering.

There is no real reason to believe that Lincoln and Mary did not enjoy regular conjugal relations.

In fact perhaps Mary shared his bed more than is believed, and Lincoln simply did not enjoy sleeping alone, which is why when Mary was not at the Summer Home with him Captain Derickson was invited to the place of honor, so to speak? In the White House he did not avail himself of cavalry during MTL's absences. Tad shared his father's bed.

Maybe he was lonely and preferred not to sleep alone.

And yes, Mary was insanely jealous. Everyone knows what happened at City Point when she saw a woman riding beside the president. If any unseemly gossip had reached her ears about AL's peculiar attention to David Derickson, she would have "reacted" to put it mildly.

Toia, you write: "They slept in separate bedrooms in the WH and for the last few years of their time in Springfield, but their rooms were always conjoined." They maintained semi-separate bedrooms?

[LincolnToddFan]

If conjoined bedrooms means semi-separate? Yes I suppose you could call it that.

They shared the same bedroom for the first 12-13 years of marriage until the enlargement of their Springfield residence in 1854-1855...then they acquired separate rooms that were connected to one another.

The same situation in their WH years, separate rooms that were conjoined. The president could access his wife's bed anytime without being seen by anyone, and the same for his wife.

ETA: Another overlooked, very poignant detail provides-in my opinion- a key about the physical intimacy that existed between the Lincolns throughout at least most of their marriage..in the last months of her life even though she was ill and confused, Mary insisted on sleeping on one side of the bed so as to keep "the president's place" as she called it free for him. This is sad, but significant. I think it confirms the idea that even in the fog of her dying days she was relying on her memories of a husband who had regularly shared her bed.

sources: Ruth Painter Randall's "Biography of a Marriage" and Jean Baker "Mary Todd Lincoln"

[L Verge]

That was typical for couples of means during the early years of our country (and earlier in Europe and even today). It assisted in mates getting sleep when one was restless, snoring, etc. It also kept servants guessing what was going on and allowed them to enter with fresh water for the basins or to help in dressing without invading the privacy of the other. Bedrooms (especially a lady's) often had desks in them where one could write by lamp light without disturbing a sleeping partner.

Again, know the customs of the day.

[LincolnToddFan]

In the Civil War WH and Summer Residence, there seemed an almost constant flow of messages from the generals to the president even in the middle of the night. Under those circumstances especially, it makes perfect sense for MTL to have had her own apartments.

But according to the First Lady's seamstress and confidante Lizzie Keckley, Lincoln sought his wife's rooms during the day to nap and read.

[Eva Elisabeth]

And to chat (in the evening): "I consider myself fortunate, if at eleven o'clock, I once more find myself, in my pleasant room and very especially, if my tired and weary Husband, is there, resting in the lounge to receive me - to chat over the occurrences of the day." (Turner, MTL, p.187)

[LincolnToddFan]

Thank you Eva E, I forgot to mention that-

[Eva Elisabeth]

As for the (semi-) seperate bedrooms in the remodeled Springfield house - it was Mary who was responsible for the remodeling and did that in her husband's abscense. And I think she just wanted to live like "a couple of means" (see Laurie's post).

[LincolnToddFan]

I agree Eva E., she definitely did. Her sister Elizabeth Edwards and her brother-in-law Ninian had separate rooms in their mansion on Aristocracy Hill in Springfield, and Mary was always keen to keep up with the Joneses.

She also wanted a home she felt was worthy of an up and coming lawyer who might be headed to the White House in time.

[David Lockmiller]

(06-30-2014 02:02 PM)Lewis Gannett Wrote:  

(06-30-2014 11:14 AM)David Lockmiller Wrote:  “Ann’s brother David urged her to marry Lincoln even before the return of her whilom fiancé, but she declined so that she could personally explain to McNamar her change of heart.” (Professor Burlingame did not provide a source reference in this instance.)

“According to her sister Sarah, Ann ‘had brain fever and was out of [her] head all the time till about two days before she died, when she came to herself and called for Abe.’ Bowling Green fetched Lincoln. When he arrived ‘everybody left the room and they talked together.’ Emerging from that room, Lincoln ‘stopped at the door and looked back. Both of them were crying.’" (Source reference: Sarah Rutledge Saunders, interview with Katherine Wheeler, Chicago Tribune Magazine, 22 Feb. 1922.)

David: Note that the interviews are dated many decades after Ann Rutledge died. I deal with these sources and these quotes at tedious length in my 2010 JALA article, p. 27.

It is my opinion that such a scene as described by Sarah Rutledge Saunders would last a lifetime in the memory of any reasonably intelligent person.

But you may also want to consider the following information regarding the engagement of Abraham Lincoln to Ann Rutledge from three letters written by R. B. Rutledge to William Herndon dated October 1866, November 18, 1866 and November 21, 1866. (Source: "The Hidden Lincoln, from the Letters and Papers of William H. Herndon," by Emanuel Hertz, Blue Ribbon Books, 1949, pp. 310 - 319. Note the advantage to the reader provided by Mr. Hertz is the added proper punctuation to make the letters more readable.)

October 1866 letter, partial response to Herndon's fourth question at pages 312-13:

[McNamar] prospered in business and, pending his engagement with Ann, he revealed his true name, returned to Ohio [New York is correct] to relieve his parents from their embarrassments, and to bring the family with him to Illinois. . . . At all events he was absent two or three years.

In the meantime Mr. Lincoln paid his addresses to Ann, continued his visits and attentions regularly, and those resulted in an engagement to marry, conditional to an honorable release from the contract with McNamar. There is no kind of doubt as to the existence of this engagement. David Rutledge urged Ann to consummate it, but she refused until such time as she could see McNamar, inform him of the change in her feelings, and seek an honorable release.

November 18, 1866 letter:

I received a copy of your lecture, a day or two since, which is bold, manly, and substantially true. I will take the liberty to throw a little light on one point for your future use; to wit, Samuel Hill first courted Ann. She declined his proposition to marry, after which McNamar paid his addresses, resulting in an engagement to marry; after McNamar left Menard County to visit his parents and during his prolonged absence, Mr. Lincoln courted Ann, resulting in a second engagement, not conditional, as language would seem to indicate, but absolute. She, however, in the conversation referred to by me, between her and David, urged the propriety of seeing Mr. McNamar, inform him of the change in her feelings,and seek an honorable release, before consummating the engagement with Mr. Lincoln by marriage.

I hope to be able to visit you this winter, as I assure you nothing would give me more pleasure than to see and talk with the man who appreciates the virtues and character of Abraham Lincoln. (page 318)

November 21, 1866 letter:

I have just received your two letters of 18th and 19th inst. and hasten to answer. . . .

You ask, fourthly: Do I get the facts all correctly, and tell them truthfully? I answer: Substantially you do, but probably a little in error in detail in one or two particulars; to wit, in your lecture you say three men fell in love with Ann Rutledge simultaneously. The facts are William Berry first courted Ann and was rejected; afterwards Samuel Hill; then John McNamar, which resulted in an engagement to marry at some future time. He, McNamar, left the county on business, was gone some years; in the meantime and during McNamar's abscence, Mr. Lincoln courted Ann and engaged to marry her, on the completion of the study of law. In this I am corroborated by James McRutledge, a cousin about her age, and who was in her confidence. He says in a letter to me just received: "Ann told me once in coming from a camp meeting on Rock Creek, that engagements made too far ahead sometimes failed, that one had failed (meaning her engagement with McNamar), and gave me to understand that as soon as certain studies were completed she and Lincoln would be married." He says you and Mr. Gogsdell talked with him on this subject, but he did not tell you as much, as he thought you had a design in it; you can correspond with him and say to him that this is no longer a delicate question, inasmuch as it must of necessity become a matter of history, that I desire the whole truth to be recorded. I think you are in error as to the of Ann's sickness; you will pardon me for my frankness, as I wish to assist you in developing the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

I have no doubt but Ann had fully detemined to break off the engagement with McNamar, but presume she had never notified him of the fact, as he did not return until afte her death. . . .

You ask me how I like your lecture. I answer I like it very much; the great wonder with me is, how you have unearthed, developed, and brought to light and life so much dead matter, and made so few mistakes.

I am, dear sir, truly your friend, R. B. Rutledge. (pages 318-19)

[Lewis Gannett]

Hi David. A couple of things to keep in mind about Robert Rutledge's nine known letters to Herndon. First, they're wonderful letters, especially the long one that Hertz dates "Oct. 1866" and Wilson & Davis date "ca. Nov. 1, 1866." This letter supplies many of the most familiar details of Lincoln's life in New Salem: feats of strength such as picking up a barrel as if to drink from the bunghole, and other famous anecdotes. Second, Robert took it upon himself to be the Rutledge family spokesman to Herndon, and as far as I can tell he did a conscientious job, writing to his mother through his older brother, John, to ask about what she knew. He did his best to collect what information he could, and it's to his credit that he doesn't appear to have exaggerated anything, which he very easily could have done. It's also worth mentioning that Robert was 17 when his sister Ann died. Third, notwithstanding his role as family spokesman, Robert didn't report any specific family memories of Lincoln courting Ann; not even from his mother. He also never asserted that Ann had ever discussed with him marriage to Lincoln (contrary to a claim made by Douglas Wilson; see my JALA article, p. 44). In short: we don't have specific memories from the Rutledge family about Lincoln courting Ann. Is that significant? Of course it is. Not even one story about a courtship involving the greatest man of the age? Robert supplied assertions that Ann and Lincoln pledged to marry; that a brother named David (long dead by the time Robert wrote Herndon) had claimed that Ann had hinted at the existence of an engagement to Lincoln; and he relayed a letter from a cousin, James McGrady Rutledge, which asserted without details that Ann and Lincoln had planned to marry. That's it. No stories. And in fact, NOBODY from that vanished New Salem era could supply Herndon with any details about a courtship. The only details had to do with Lincoln's perceived reaction to Ann Rutledge's death. And as mentioned, Lincoln's two recorded statements about the death concerned rain on her grave. But here's the most telling aspect of the Rutledge family account as delivered by Robert: like everybody else from the New Salem era who cared to comment, he too claimed that the smoking-gun proof for a love affair was Lincoln's great grief. But he ALSO admitted that he hadn't personally witnessed this grief. And he supplied no accounts that any OTHER family member had witnessed grief. This is the way I sum up the Rutledge testimony in the article: "If the family spokesman invoked what the family hadn't witnessed--the grief story--to sustain what the family also hadn't witnessed--the romance story--how much of a house of cards supports those stories?" (p. 47)

[LincolnToddFan]

Speaking of Rutledge family letters....

We know that for two or three months in the winter of 1834-1835 Lincoln was away from New Salem, attending the state legislature in Vandalia. Why has not a single, solitary letter ever been found from A.L. to the woman he was allegedly so deeply in love with by then and planning to marry? We are told by Albert Beveridge in his Life of Lincoln that the Rutledges were a family who wrote lots of letters and kept all the ones they received, and that this was a tradition in that family(Vol I, pgs 150-151)

In fact, not only are there no letters from AL to AR while she was alive, but if the Rutledges were the kinsmen of the woman AL loved to distraction why did he never keep in touch with them after he left New Salem? They came within a hair's breadth of becoming his in-laws.(if the engagement story is true) There were presumably deaths in the family after Ann died, births, weddings.... yet there are no letters of condolence or congratulations, no visits from Lincoln to them, no...nothing over the years? Nor in fact, FROM the Rutledges to AL? I understand that he was unlikely to have kept in touch as much with them after his wedding. But what about the seven years that elapsed between the time he left New Salem and his marriage to Mary?

And if Ann was sick for several weeks before she died, why do we read of only one visit from her "fiancé"?

I am not one of the ones who believes that there was no romance between the two...there probably was. But these things have always struck me as odd, odd, odd.

[STS Lincolnite]

I understand, from reading this thread, that Ann Rutledge was still engaged to another man at the time of her alleged relationship with AL. Is it possible that in light of this and the customs of the time that there was no overt "courting" and that letters would have been kept to a minimum or even destroyed? It seems to me, especially considering the "social rules" of the time, one of the only things worse (with regards to the pre-marriage ritual) than courting another man's fiancée would be flaunting it - whether or not the man Ann was first engaged to was around to object.

[Eva Elisabeth]

(07-01-2014 06:32 PM)LincolnToddFan Wrote:  I am not one of the ones who believes that there was no romance between the two...there probably was. But these things have always struck me as odd, odd, odd.

I'm either not someone who strictly insists in certain believes - all is possible in the end - but I agree, these things are odd, odd, odd. A man who's most appreciated and adored for his high moral values and standards, shall have been gay on one hand, neverthless married, but indulged his passion as soon as his wife was absent, on the other hand shall have dated and solely loved a (still) engaged woman, even been willing to mate poaching...all just based on questionable "evidence"..."Thus grew the tale of Wonderland: Thus slowly, one by one,
Its quaint events were hammered out
And now the tale is done." I can't help it - to me, it smells a great deal like that.

[RJNorton]

(07-02-2014 07:39 AM)Eva Elisabeth Wrote:  but indulged his passion as soon as his wife was absent

This is exactly why I asked my question about 20+ weeks away from Springfield each year on the circuit. Given that length of time I would think there would be some "tales from the circuit," but nothing definitive is there.

[David Lockmiller]

(07-01-2014 01:11 PM)Lewis Gannett Wrote:  Hi David. A couple of things to keep in mind about Robert Rutledge's nine known letters to Herndon. First, they're wonderful letters, especially the long one that Hertz dates "Oct. 1866" and Wilson & Davis date "ca. Nov. 1, 1866." This letter supplies many of the most familiar details of Lincoln's life in New Salem: feats of strength such as picking up a barrel as if to drink from the bunghole, and other famous anecdotes. Second, Robert took it upon himself to be the Rutledge family spokesman to Herndon, and as far as I can tell he did a conscientious job, writing to his mother through his older brother, John, to ask about what she knew. He did his best to collect what information he could, and it's to his credit that he doesn't appear to have exaggerated anything, which he very easily could have done. It's also worth mentioning that Robert was 17 when his sister Ann died. Third, notwithstanding his role as family spokesman, Robert didn't report any specific family memories of Lincoln courting Ann; not even from his mother. He also never asserted that Ann had ever discussed with him marriage to Lincoln (contrary to a claim made by Douglas Wilson; see my JALA article, p. 44). In short: we don't have specific memories from the Rutledge family about Lincoln courting Ann. Is that significant? Of course it is. Not even one story about a courtship involving the greatest man of the age? Robert supplied assertions that Ann and Lincoln pledged to marry; that a brother named David (long dead by the time Robert wrote Herndon) had claimed that Ann had hinted at the existence of an engagement to Lincoln; and he relayed a letter from a cousin, James McGrady Rutledge, which asserted without details that Ann and Lincoln had planned to marry. That's it. No stories. And in fact, NOBODY from that vanished New Salem era could supply Herndon with any details about a courtship. The only details had to do with Lincoln's perceived reaction to Ann Rutledge's death. And as mentioned, Lincoln's two recorded statements about the death concerned rain on her grave. But here's the most telling aspect of the Rutledge family account as delivered by Robert: like everybody else from the New Salem era who cared to comment, he too claimed that the smoking-gun proof for a love affair was Lincoln's great grief. But he ALSO admitted that he hadn't personally witnessed this grief. And he supplied no accounts that any OTHER family member had witnessed grief. This is the way I sum up the Rutledge testimony in the article: "If the family spokesman invoked what the family hadn't witnessed--the grief story--to sustain what the family also hadn't witnessed--the romance story--how much of a house of cards supports those stories?" (p. 47)

"[D]uring McNamar's abscence, Mr. Lincoln courted Ann and engaged to marry her, on the completion of the study of law. In this I am corroborated by James McRutledge, a cousin about her age, and who was in her confidence. He says in a letter to me just received: "Ann told me once in coming from a camp meeting on Rock Creek, that engagements made too far ahead sometimes failed, that one had failed (meaning her engagement with McNamar), and gave me to understand that as soon as certain studies were completed she and Lincoln would be married." (R. B. Rutledge's letter of November 21, 1866 )

I would conclude that your evidentiary standards are extremely high (far too high) when you do not wish to admit the fact of an engagement to marry between Ann Rutledge and Abraham Lincoln. In my opinion, the above quotation contains two statements (one indirect) from relatives of Ann Rutledge constituting an acknowledgement of an engagement to marry between Ann Rutledge and Abraham Lincoln.