Miss Todd left at the altar

[Donna McCreary]

In another thread, we began to discuss whether or not the story of Abraham leaving Mary at the altar is a true story. I think it is a myth that is based on a minor piece of fact. Yes, Miss Todd was left standing alone on her wedding day. However, the "Miss Todd" in question was not Mary, but rather her sister Ann.

From a letter written by Julia Trumbull to her sister-in-law (dated November 18, 1846) we learn that Ann’s summer vacation had included a summer romance. Julia’s tone reflects some disapproval of the groom, or at least disapproval of his common last name.

“You remember Ann Todd of Springfield. She this summer paid a visit to Carrolton where she received acquainted with a gentleman named Smith (an unusual & romantic name is it not?) on her return home she made extensive preparations for a wedding, had a number of party dresses made.”

Julia went into details about the wedding plans and the events of the wedding day. She wrote, “at the appointed time instead of the groom, the intelligence reached her that he was sick.” The groom was not going to arrive that day. Ann, probably embarrassed and furious about being stood up, stated that, “she had learned that Mr. Smith’s health was very delicate & fearing she would be a young widow, she had declined marrying him.” Clark Smith arrived in Springfield the following Sunday determined to marry Ann. The wedding was quickly arranged with “Ann hardly giving her sisters time to dress for the occasion.”

There were no parties of celebrations for Ann and Clark following the ceremony. The left for Carrolton that same night and soon began their family.

Years later when Springfield gossips were repeating the story of Miss Todd being left on her wedding day, it is possible those recording the story confused the two Miss Todds.

The question was asked earlier, did William Herndon deliberately replace "Mary Ann Todd" with "Ann Todd" to hurt or embarrass Mary? Or did he make an honest mistake?

[RJNorton]

For many years I believed the story. When I was in high school my English teacher taught the story as fact. He told us Lincoln was insecure around women in general, and therefore his "no show" at the last minute seemed to fit his overall persona.

[Laurie Verge]

Thanks to this thread, I will be correcting my history also. I always heard that Lincoln left Mary "at the altar" the first time around also. Thanks for this "teaching moment."

[BettyO]

(08-16-2012 08:19 AM)Laurie Verge Wrote:  Thanks to this thread, I will be correcting my history also. I always heard that Lincoln left Mary "at the altar" the first time around also. Thanks for this "teaching moment."

Same here! I had always heard that Abe got cold feet at the last minute and left Mary at the altar ---

So I guess I'll "alter" my history as well!

Thanks!

[LincolnMan]

According to author Benjamin P. Thomas, as written in his book Abraham Lincoln, the Lincoln leaving Mary Todd at the altar story came from none other than William H. Herndon. Herndon, in need of making a living at the time, sold copies of the material he had been collecting for a book on Lincoln to Ward Hill Lamon. Lamon's book The Life of Abraham Lincoln appeared in 1872- and contain the "altar story." Because the material for Lamon's book actually came from Herndon, there were several other sensational items found therein, including: Thomas Lincoln was a lazy vagabond, Lincoln loved smutty stories, Mrs. Lincoln was a shrew, and Ann Rutledge was the only woman Lincoln ever loved. By the way, Lamon didn't actually write the book. It was ghost written by Chauncey F. black, son of Buchanan's Attorney General.

[Donna McCreary]

(08-16-2012 07:44 PM)LincolnMan Wrote:  According to author Benjamin P. Thomas, as written in his book Abraham Lincoln, the Lincoln leaving Mary Todd at the altar story came from none other than William H. Herndon. Herndon, in need of making a living at the time, sold copies of the material he had been collecting for a book on Lincoln to Ward Hill Lamon. Lamon's book The Life of Abraham Lincoln appeared in 1872- and contain the "altar story." Because the material for Lamon's book actually came from Herndon, there were several other sensational items found therein, including: Thomas Lincoln was a lazy vagabond, Lincoln loved smutty stories, Mrs. Lincoln was a shrew, and Ann Rutledge was the only woman Lincoln ever loved. By the way, Lamon didn't actually write the book. It was ghost written by Chauncey F. black, son of Buchanan's Attorney General.

So, my question remains . . . Did Herndon switch the names of Ann and Mary Ann Todd to hurt Mary, or was it an honest mistake? Did the person who told Herndon the story mix up the sisters' names. Not that I am defending Herndon, but I can see someone telling the story about "Miss Todd" and the listener assuming it was Mary.

[Rob Wick]

Is it mentioned who told him this in Herndon's Informants? I'm not near my copy, but if it was one of the people he interviewed, i would think it would be in there.

Best
Rob

[RJNorton]

Rob, it looks to me like it came from an interview with Elizabeth Edwards (p. 443) and also a second interview with Elizabeth and Ninian Edwards (p. 592). My pages numbers are references to Herndon's Informants. In the first interview it is mentioned that the supper was ready. In the second interview the words "arrangements for wedding had been made...even cakes had been baked...but L. failed to appear" are used. Donna, do you feel the Edwardses created or embellished the story? Or possibly Herndon wrote down some things they really didn't say? Didn't the Edwardses originally oppose the marriage?

[Donna McCreary]

(08-17-2012 03:29 PM)RJNorton Wrote:  Rob, it looks to me like it came from an interview with Elizabeth Edwards (p. 443) and also a second interview with Elizabeth and Ninian Edwards (p. 592). My pages numbers are references to Herndon's Informants. In the first interview it is mentioned that the supper was ready. In the second interview the words "arrangements for wedding had been made...even cakes had been baked...but L. failed to appear" are used. Donna, do you feel the Edwardses created or embellished the story? Or possibly Herndon wrote down some things they really didn't say? Didn't the Edwardses originally oppose the marriage?

Elizabeth did oppose the marriage. However, when Frances Wallace was interviewed years later, she said there was only one wedding planned for Mary and Abraham. I'd have to do some digging, but I am thinking later, Elizabeth also said there was only one wedding planned. Did Elizabeth change her story?
In the case of Ann Todd -- yes, the wedding supper was prepared and the cakes were baked when C. M.Smith did not show due to his illness. Did Herndon hear this story from Elizabeth and Ninian and change the names?

I think he did. It was a Todd family story, and it humanized Lincoln -- which seems to have been Herndon's goal. Even if Elizabeth and Ninian confused the sisters, (very doubtful) others claimed there was only one wedding. I think if it were a true story, more people would have told it - especially those who had a score to settle with Mary. Just as Julia gossiped about Ann's failed attempt, a failed attempt at marriage for Mary would also have been good gossip - even more so when Herndon was interviewing people. To have two sisters jilted by their grooms would have been gossip for decades. Did Herndon mention the story in his own writings? Or did he only have knowledge of the story through the Edwardses interview?
As with so many things "Lincoln," an answered question raises more questions.

[Rob Wick]

To be honest, I've not given it much thought as to whether it happened or not. However, there are a few thoughts I have.

First, Herndon was a lot of things, but I don't think careless was one of them. I said in another thread that not only did he hear Elizabeth Edwards say it, but so did Jesse Weik, at least according to Albert J. Beveridge. I can't see that Herndon would have gotten the two sisters confused.

Second, someone was lying. Either it was Elizabeth and Ninian Edwards or it was Herndon. If it was Herndon, the obvious answer to the obvious question would be to make Mary Todd look bad, as he did with the Ann Rutledge lecture. However, it seems to me this story makes Lincoln look worse. It makes him look like someone who was supposedly betrothed and couldn't make himself go through with it--in other words, he wouldn't honor an obligation.

That said, I'm still not sure where I land.

Best
Rob

[LincolnMan]

Rob: I agree with you that it was probably Herndon. While we owe so much to him for the wealth of information he provided, we realize he had an agenda which, at times, sacrificed truth.

[RJNorton]

I wonder...if this really happened...why don't we have more accounts of it? At the wedding in 1842 we know all sorts of details such as who the best man was, who the bridesmaids were, the fact that Reverend Dresser presided, etc. We even know about Judge Browne's unusual outburst during the ceremony ("God Almighty, Lincoln, the statute fixes all that."). I believe about 30 guests were present. So, if we assume there were roughly 30 folks at the "phantom" wedding, why don't we know more about it?

[Rob Wick]

Bill,
I think I need to clarify a point. I'm not sure it was Herndon who was lying. He obviously didn't make it up out of whole cloth, since there were two separate people who heard Elizabeth Edwards say that a wedding took place (Herndon, Weik). And as I said, the story doesn't hurt Mary like the Ann Rutledge story does, because she was the innocent victim.

Roger, just playing devil's' advocate here, but is it possible that there could have been, for want of a better term, a "conspiracy of silence" between many guests to not say anything, especially in the light of Herndon's Springfield lecture? To say that Lincoln left MTL at the altar would give credence to Herndon's claims about Ann being the only true love he had. And I wonder, did the story ever get out before Lamon put it in his book about Lincoln in 1872? If not, then isn't such a conspiracy possible?

Best
Rob

[RJNorton]

Hi Rob. I agree anything is possible. Like with many Lincoln-related topics, we may never get to the "whole truth" on this one. I'd like to throw another name in the mix - Matilda Edwards. I think she was Ninian Edwards' cousin. I think I once read that Douglas, Speed, Lincoln, and half the young men in Springfield were after her! I wonder what, if any, role she plays in all of this. Perhaps Lincoln left Mary at the altar because he thought he loved Matilda more? Maybe that's a stretch, but it does seem there are several possibilities regarding this topic. I am still leaning to disbelieving the "no show" story, but I am open to all possibilities.

Donna, please correct me if I am wrong, but I think Matilda was only a teenager at this point in time.

[LincolnMan]

Rob: point well taken. And, yes, the story makes Lincoln look bad instead of Mary. Just as an aside, i wonder if C.A. Tripp used the story to give credence to his "Lincoln was really gay" thesis? I've not read his book.