My angel mother

[Rob Wick]

All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.
--Abraham Lincoln

Please pardon, if you will, the sentimentality, but today would have been the 80th birthday of my angel mother, who died in 2003 after a two-year battle with cancer.

If your parents are still with you, take a moment to let them know how much they mean to you. If they have passed on, take a moment and reflect upon their influence on you.

Happy birthday, Mom. I love you!

Best
Rob

[MaddieM]

All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.
--Abraham Lincoln

Please pardon, if you will, the sentimentality, but today would have been the 80th birthday of my angel mother, who died in 2003 after a two-year battle with cancer.

If your parents are still with you, take a moment to let them know how much they mean to you. If they have passed on, take a moment and reflect upon their influence on you.

Happy birthday, Mom. I love you!

Best
Rob

My mum passed 8 years ago to cancer. I miss her every day. Even now, I sometimes wake up and can't comprehend she isn't around...at least not in this world. I feel her around me though, sometimes.

[LincolnMan]

Rob: thanks for the post about your mother. Sometimes we may need reminders about how special they are. May I ask you and the Forum members your opinion on something? To which "mother" was Lincoln referring to-Nancy or Sarah?

[RJNorton]

Bill, I lean toward Nancy. I believe Herndon reported that the quote came within an overall discussion concerning Lincoln's opinion that illegitimate children were often sturdier and brighter than those born in lawful wedlock. Lincoln said his mother was illegitimate, and he said her father was a "well bred Virginia farmer or planter."

[Rob Wick]

Bill,

I would have to agree with Roger, but I think he would have shared the same sentiment about Sarah. I think it's telling that he wanted to go to Charleston to visit her before leaving for Washington.

MaddieM, I too feel the influence of my mom everyday, even if it's when I tell myself I don't need a second piece of cake.

Best
Rob

[LincolnMan]

Based on the reported conversation between Lincoln and Herndon (as told by Herndon)-it sounds like he was referring to Nancy. Rob: I agree also with what you said concerning Sarah. That meeting that Lincoln had with Sarah that you referenced is loaded with emotion. She felt he would never see him again. I understand that when she died she was buried in a black dress Lincoln gave her on the last visit between them.

[HerbS]

Rob,My wife died a year ago today of Dementia and it is "kicking my butt"! Both of my parents died 15yrs ago!Enough already-God!!!

[L Verge]

Rob,

Thank you for that loving tribute to your mother. Mine died three years ago at age 94. She was a great lover of history also, and I wish that I had paid more attention to some of the things she told me - especially family history.

She was also the one who made sure that I got a college education in an era where women were supposed to have MRS degrees instead of MAs. Much of my college education was started with Roosevelt dimes and Franklin half-dollars that she started saving when I was a tadpole.

[Rogerm]

Rob,

I, too, would like to thank you for that tribute to your mother. I am fortunate enough to still have both of my parents in relatively good health. My father is 91 and my mother 87. But, your tribute is a reminder for me not to take their presence for granted.

[BettyO]

Rob,

I, too, would like to thank you for that tribute to your mother. I am fortunate enough to still have both of my parents in relatively good health. My father is 91 and my mother 87. But, your tribute is a reminder for me not to take their presence for granted.

Thank you, Rob for that beautiful tribute to your mom. I still have my 89 year old mother with me - and she is a true blessing and my best friend! I'm very, very lucky! I do miss my dad though, who passed away 31 years ago.

Parents are to be cherished!

[Rob Wick]

Thanks all for the kind words. It's been a rough day, but her memory keeps me going. I delivered the eulogy at her funeral and when I closed, I said this:

I think the greatest gift my mother ever gave me was the love of reading. After Dad died, she bought a set of World Book encyclopedias and also enrolled me in the Dr. Seuss book of the month club. I spent several rainy Saturday afternoons--and probably some sunny ones as well--reading those encyclopedias and other books.
One of the ways I coped with Mom’s illness was through reading. I finished a novel by the writer William Styron and immediately bought all the books he had published, including a book of essays.
One of those essays was on the writer F. Scott Fitzgerald. Fitzgerald wrote a letter of condolence to friends who had lost two sons within three years. There was a quote that just as soon as I read it I knew would have to be shared when this day came.
Fitzgerald wrote “Who was it who said it was astounding how deepest grief can change in time to a sort of joy? The golden bowl is broken indeed, but it was golden; nothing can ever take those boys away from you now.”
As long as we keep and cherish our memories, no one will ever take that golden soul away from us.

Best
Rob

[Donna McCreary]

Rob, that is a lovely and moving tribute to your mother. Mine is now 76 years old, and we talk every day. She always tells me her goal in life is to make me laugh every day. She is succesful.
To answer the question about "my angel mother," I think Lincoln was referring to Nancy. When we look at the Victorian language, the word "angel" seems to imply the person is deceased. Mary referred to her boys as many things, but only as her "angel boys" upon their deaths.

[L Verge]

Excellent point, Donna, about Victorian symbolism and language related to mourning. It is a study of culture in its own right. I was raised with that same respect for the dead, and I guess that's why I have a hard time accepting the current trend to want to dig up historical figures centuries after their death to satisfy historical curiosity.

For years, Surratt House Museum held a Victorian mourning exhibit; and the photos, memorabilia, jewelry, hair wreaths, art, etc. associated with the death of loved ones were touching and reverent.

[Donna McCreary]

Excellent point, Donna, about Victorian symbolism and language related to mourning. It is a study of culture in its own right. I was raised with that same respect for the dead, and I guess that's why I have a hard time accepting the current trend to want to dig up historical figures centuries after their death to satisfy historical curiosity.

For years, Surratt House Museum held a Victorian mourning exhibit; and the photos, memorabilia, jewelry, hair wreaths, art, etc. associated with the death of loved ones were touching and reverent.

I wish I lived closer to the Surratt House Museum so I could visit such wonderful exhibits as the one you mentioned. One of my most requested lectures is one titled "Mourning, It's A Way of Life." People always enjoy it, but the pictures of dead children seem "creepy" to modern eyes. You are correct to say it is a culture in its own right. So often, we forget the rules, symbolism, and reasons for them. A few years ago when attending a funeral in Southern Indiana, all of the family members wore black or black and white. Well, everyone except the widow. There were whispers when she appeared wearing kelly green. The couple had moved to Florida many years prior, and there was an understanding that she had just forgotten what was proper.

[BettyO]

Excellent point, Donna, about Victorian symbolism and language related to mourning. It is a study of culture in its own right. I was raised with that same respect for the dead, and I guess that's why I have a hard time accepting the current trend to want to dig up historical figures centuries after their death to satisfy historical curiosity.

For years, Surratt House Museum held a Victorian mourning exhibit; and the photos, memorabilia, jewelry, hair wreaths, art, etc. associated with the death of loved ones were touching and reverent.

I wish I lived closer to the Surratt House Museum so I could visit such wonderful exhibits as the one you mentioned. One of my most requested lectures is one titled "Mourning, It's A Way of Life." People always enjoy it, but the pictures of dead children seem "creepy" to modern eyes. You are correct to say it is a culture in its own right. So often, we forget the rules, symbolism, and reasons for them. A few years ago when attending a funeral in Southern Indiana, all of the family members wore black or black and white. Well, everyone except the widow. There were whispers when she appeared wearing kelly green. The couple had moved to Florida many years prior, and there was an understanding that she had just forgotten what was proper.

I have always had an interest in Victorian culture as well as Civil War history and like Laurie, am a firm believer that in order to understand the Civil War, the Lincolns and yes, even the assassination and the conspirators - one has to "know" the people involved - i.e. what made people who they were; how were they raised? What were the social customs they were taught, how did they dress and why, what did their behavior and manners entail, why did they conduct themselves in a certain way, etc.

Mourning social custom and symbolism was as you say a VERY big part of life as was death. It seems creepy to us today - but it was not to the Victorians. They were more closely allied to mortality than we are today and what seems creepy to us was a vital part of their existence.