Lincoln and His Father

[Donna McCreary]

Thomas Lincoln died on Januray 17, 1851, and it is true that Abraham did not attend his father's funeral. It is possible the lack of funeral visitation had nothing to do with the relationship between father and son and more to do with the relationship between a husband and his wife. Mary's maternal grandmother died on January 22, 1850. This death was quickly followed by the death of the Lincoln's young son Edward Baker Lincoln who died on February 1, 1850. Both parents were severaly depressed. Sometimes, the best way to fight depression is to bring a new baby into the family. The Lincoln's welcomed William Wallace Lincoln on December 21, 1850. Thomas died less than a month later.
It would have been horrible to have Mary alone with a new born baby after the emotionally difficult year the couple had endured. Abraham's best course of action was to stay home at that juncture in time.
Sometimes, we have to look at every aspect of a person's life and not just one fact when trying to understand that person's actions. Without written documentation as to exactly why Lincoln did not attend his father's funeral, it is impossible to know if the choice was because of a strained relationship with his father, or because of a need and desire to support and comfort his wife.